Sorry for the lack of updates, everyone. I wish I could say that it was because I was super busy with health projects (that's sort of true... emphasis on the "sort of"), or learning Guarani (also only a little true), but it's actually my own laziness and neglecting it, so for that I apologize. I'll try to be a bit better about updating.
Anyways, has it really been 6 months since I arrived in Paraguay? Time has gone by crazy fast, I must say. So, I've realized that through my blogging I haven't really clued you in to the random, bizarre, and sometimes hilarious oddities that I've noticed here in Paraguay. Here I present the Random Facts list:
- Motos aka motorcycles. You generally don't just see one or two people on a moto. Often it will be a family of 5, the occasional chainsaw, or a pig. I've even witnessed a person in a wheelchair holding onto the back of a moto. Hardly anyone wears helmets. It is also common to see 10-year olds driving motorcycles.
- Chickens crow at dawn. They also crow at 8am. And 9am. And 10am. Just when you think they couldn't crow anymore, they crow at 10:01am. I'd imagine that they eventually tire and sleep, but those wonderful animals have dispoven this theory multiple times when I wake up at midnight to more crowing. They must work in shifts to ensure that they can be heard at all hours of the day. Another side note about chickens: despite having been here for 6 months, I still laugh when I see them run. They just look so silly.
- My least favorite word in the Spanish language is Enseguida. This is the entry in my Spanish-English dictionary:
enseguida adv at once, immediately, straight away.
To the average American, this would actually mean "immediately" or "straight away." However, in Paraguay, this is simply untrue. Many times I've gotten the "I'll be there enseguida" and have waited from anywhere between 30 minutes and 4 hours. Sometimes it means "never." Oh hora Paraguaya. I love enseguida-ing other people. Hate being enseguida-ed.
- In Asuncion, it's not uncommon to have motorcycles, buses, cars, trucks, and ox-drawn or horse-drawn carts sharing the same road.
- While we're still on the transportation topic, let's discuss the buses here. I've been on buses that look (and probably are) brand new. The have reclining seats that are big and comfy looking and nice TVs. Just beautiful. I have also been on buses that look like they may or will fall apart any second. Also, it is not uncommon to board a bus to find that all the seats are taken and you end up standing the majority of the way to your destination. The times that you do get a seat, be advised that you will probably at some point or another have the inevitable crotch-in-the-face moment(s) or hour(s). You will also probably drive down an unpaved road for a good portion of the trip, making it a very bumpy crotch-in-the-face ride.
- I have seen more boobs here in 6 months than I would have liked to see in my life. I'll be sitting and talking with someone when they all of a sudden decide to feed their kid. This can be in their house, on their porch, on the bus, someone else's house, a party. You name it, they probably would do it there. Additionally, children breastfeed for a LONG time. My 4-year old host sister here occasionally is breastfed by her aunt.
- Kids and personal space do not go together. At all. Not only are my belongings constantly touched, but I've grown accustomed to drinking or eating something and having a child literally 10 inches from my face just staring. This also happens when I'm working on anything from writing a letter to preparing charla materials.
- There is no concept of inside voices. You could be 5 houses away or in the same house and the volume level stays the same. Today I was sitting outside with a friend and couldn't even focus on what he was saying because one of the boys across the street was yelling at the top of his lungs for his sister to come home for lunch. She was in their front yard. Mom, I'm sorry for all those times you asked me to call Nick and Austin down for dinner and I just stood in the kitchen and shouted at them. I now understand.
- In talking with other volunteers, we've discovered where the American rejected clothes have gone. One friend's obese mother has a shirt that says "Gravity Sucks." It is important to note that she has huge boobs and does not wear a bra. Another friend has witnessed a young child wearing a shirt with a picture of a cat on it and "Happy pussy" written on it. My other friend saw a 2-year old with a shirt that has a picture of a milkshake on it and "Sex Shake." Almost everyone has a playboy shirt. This includes small children and old ladies.
- Medical beliefs here are... odd. I once had a stomach ache and when I told my host mom she said that it was because I had my fan on at night and the wind got trapped in my stomach. The cure? Put some tobacco leaves on your back. I've decided that if I ever pursue medicine as a career, I will most definitely use these responses.
- Vegetables are almost always added into meals, but you can never tell when you're eating them. They tend to be cut into indecipherable pieces so I can't tell if I'm eating a carrot or a green pepper. Also, for a pot of soup for a family of 5, generally only half of a pepper is used.
- 3-year olds drinking beer through a straw. I see something very wrong with this. Who drinks beer through a straw? Also the fact that it's a three-year old is slightly to moderately disturbing.
- Old dudes with young chicks. I still don't understand the appeal. 15 year old girls with 40 year old dudes. Really?
- School cancelations for anything. A few weeks ago the kids were on Winter break. Winter break was extended for another week because it was too cold for the kids to be in school. This would be a legitimate excuse, however, that entire week it was in the 80s. El Dia del Nino is coming up, so naturally school is cancelled. In fact, apparently they have clowns, games, cake, candy, and cookies for the kids. Perfect opportunity for a dental charla :o)
- Tons of holidays. We have a lot of them in the States too, but let's be honest, who really celebrates friendship day? Here, dia de la amistad is HUGE. I got tons of texts that day from Paraguayan friends thanking me for what I do here and for being a good friend. My favorite was a 10-year old girl who came over to my house to give me a hug and say happy friendship day. I think the world would be a better place if we all celebrated this.
- I've been called fat by my aunt and host mom, meanwhile, they're both overweight and my aunt has high blood pressure. However, fat here isn't like, "Oh man, you're HUGE!" Instead it's a term of endearment, more or less. Also, if you're fat, you must be happy. For the record, I'm not fat and I'm still happy. I've also heard that if you're skinny, you must be in love. Apparently you cannot be happy AND in love at the same time.
- Paraguay really does get cold! I didn't believe people when they said that it was the coldest they'd ever been. I always just thought, yeah well I'm from the Northeast. I know what cold is. Well, truthfully, I've been colder but I've never been this cold for such a prolonged period of time. Back in the good old USA, if I'm cold I just go inside and my problem is solved. Here if I'm cold, I go inside and it's just as cold! It's inescapable. Boo 40 degree weather.
I'm sure that as I spend more time here in this wonderful, quirky place I call home I'll have more fun, random facts for you all.
Love,
Carden xoxo
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fun facts - some of which id forgotten! :0) stay warm with mate dulce!
ReplyDeleteDrinking 3-year-olds? Jeez, I just turned 21 3 weeks ago. And I had one glass of wine and was completely giggly for the rest of the night. Clearly Paraguayan 3-year-olds could totally take me.
ReplyDeleteAnd I want to celebrate Friendship Day. That sounds like so much fun.
Miss you!!!!